Things That Jump Out
Last week I slacked on this project. To tell the truth it was because I needed a break from the emotional intensity of the work. During the past few days, I got back into it and started rewatching some of the interviews. I began by watching some that I remembered were more emotional. I assumed that it would be more manageable because I had just distanced myself from these thoughts and because it would be my second time hearing the stories. But again, I was wrong.
I remember part way through the interview stage I became slightly desensitized to the stories. I began finding patterns, hearing the same words used to express the same feelings. And by no means was I bored or tired of the interviews, but I felt when I sat down, that I knew what people were about to tell me. I knew how they felt. If they were going to cry, I knew when in the conversation it would happen. This repeated cycle made me less sensitive to the details of each individuals’ story. I remember the relief I felt after completing my last interview. I felt bad for feeling this way but I knew it would get better after a while. I think I had reached a point where the sadness took over, and the point where people who are living this sadness usually give up.
Even after a short break, I still felt the same pain and sadness while rewatching the interviews, that I felt when first talking to these people. I noticed that I was already falling behind on my project timeline, and knew that I could not afford to lose more time. So, I decided to begin the organizational and brainstorming phase of the project this week, which included rewatching the interviews and creating different mind maps. I have been separating the information into three different mind maps: Words that jump out at me, possible themes for the music and possible textures and sounds for the music. I have also started a list of quotes, that I can use as the titles for the songs, or as topics for possible lyrics. This week I will also begin to research Ukrainian music, traditions and poetry.
Thank you for joining me in this project.
This project is made possible with the support of Canada Council for the Arts.